1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
