my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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