You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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