I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
whose parrot is this?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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