In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize