Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
i believe in u and ur pee
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
