i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You ate ashes out of my bong
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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