just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
