forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
