My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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