If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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