but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
