Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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