Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
You're so nebulous sometimes
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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