It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
