Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
