I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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