we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
