Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
