I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
