he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
