Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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