Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
