Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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