How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
