True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
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this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
