oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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