You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
