watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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