Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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