When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
