Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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