My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
