what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
