Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
