If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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