So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
