I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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