Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
