I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
