Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
