No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
