she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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