when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Randomize
