thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Everything about him screamed your future.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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