Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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