Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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