please come you make the beer taste better
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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