Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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