she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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